My Most Deepest of Thoughts

If I don’t vote for Hillary, I’m voting for Trump. If I don’t vote for Trump, I’m voting for Hillary. So, when I vote for Gary Johnson does that mean I am voting and not voting for both Clinton and Trump simultaneously?

In a special episode of Hannity, Donald Trump was the guest. You know, it’s a Day ending in Y.

That moment when politicians repeat themselves and you just laugh cause you would never do something like that.

I see the hashtag Shower Thoughts on Twitter lately. Honestly, they’re just like Deep Thoughts, only wetter and without Jack Handy’s voice reciting them.

The Cookie Crook is still on the loose. Will a Presidential candidate take a bold stance against his shenanigans?

A recent poll showed 13% of voters said they’d vote for a meteor that will destroy all human life over Clinton or Trump, so I’d say voters are pretty optimistic about this election.

The idea that third party candidates can’t win is a reason some people don’t vote third party, but people being unwilling to vote third party would be exactly the reason why they may be unable to win.

When I first heard of Brexit, I assumed it was about a person sneaking out of brunch early.

The Constitution Party nominated Darrell Castle – a man who has flirted with Truther-ism and perpetuates the false theory that Angela Merkel is Hitler’s daughter. So, in other words, it’s a regular election cycle for the Constitution Party.

If only Presidential candidates were still this inspiring:

For the record, the Prohibition Party nominee for President, James Hedges, has more experience in elected office than Donald Trump. Just saying.

Clinton won’t get prosecuted because she did not intend to violate the law. If intentions are all that matter, does that mean a man could run over a group of people in his car and claim his “intention” was to drive home?

So far neither major party Presidential candidate have made a firm stance on whether they would fight to bring the Hamburglar to justice. This still concerns me.

Trust in a Presidential candidate is totally overrated.

That moment when the entire campaign cycle feels like a parody of campaign cycles and you are still waiting for Ashton Kutcher to tell America that we’ve been “punked” while rolling out the real Presidential candidates.

I feel like Clinton and Trump must have both been voted “Most Likely to Be Impeached” in High School.

That moment when politicians repeat themselves and you just laugh cause you would never do something like that.

If someone gives a hot take on a hot take, does that make it a hotter take? Or a hothotake? The latter sounds like a fake Egyptian deity straight out of a Mummy movie.

After listening to the Hamilton soundtrack, I really want Lin Manuel Miranda to tackle everyone’s favorite lesser known leader from U.S. History: Warren G. Harding

A rap battle between Harrison and Cleveland would be epic.

Anyone else remember Donald Trump doing that raggey rap sort of thing?

Never change, New York Post.


This is my 4th set of Deep Thoughts post on the 2016 race. You can read the first three herehere, and here.


About the Author

Matthew Newman
Matthew Newman is a Christian environmental engineer (Professionally licensed in Maryland). He’s also a husband, beard aficionado, Dad of four beautiful children, blogger, and all around geeky guy from Baltimore County. When he’s not chasing his kids or working, he’s probably asleep.

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