Relating Differently

When I was a teenager, I was way more angsty than I remember being. No, really. I don’t recall myself being a big ball of angst, but when I listen to music I listened to then I keep finding myself thinking – “I totally did not relate to this at all, why did I ever think I did.” Then, I re-listened to Goldfinger’s “Question.”

WARNING: Parental guidance suggested when listening, language includes cursing

The song is a ball of angst about a person who says, “You don’t know pain, I do. Stop complaining.” Then I remember comments from various friends with one kid. Hearing them complaining about the difficulty of parenting, how challenging it is to balance their free time and dealing with a single baby. Now, for current readers you may be well aware that I have four kids, the youngest of which are twin girls who will be two in July. Comments like this make me laugh because, one kid isn’t really all that challenging. Having two at once suddenly while already having two older children to take care of – that was by far a bigger challenge.


This brings me back to Goldfinger. When I hear the lyrics, I think back to these parents and imagine these words being directed at these parents of single kids by parents of multiple kids:

You got some question about your life
You don’t know how you’ll ever make it through
It hurts so bad but it’s all you got
You’re asking me for help
but all I got to say now is that
You don’t know what pain is
You haven’t suffered one iota
so just stop your whining
you don’t know what pain is

Stop complaining point your finger
I’ll tell you who to blame

And then I laugh again. I find the song relatable again for now totally different reasons.

Have you ever looked back at something you thought you related to before to find yourself relating to it for a totally different reason? Discuss in the comments.

About the Author

Matthew Newman
Matthew Newman is a Christian environmental engineer (Professionally licensed in Maryland). He’s also a husband, beard aficionado, Dad of four beautiful children, blogger, and all around geeky guy from Baltimore County. When he’s not chasing his kids or working, he’s probably asleep.

2 Comments on "Relating Differently"

  1. I just relistened to that album. Though very angsty, it’s still pretty good.

    • Matthew Newman | April 11, 2016 at 2:15 pm | Reply

      So ridiculously angsty. 20 Cent Goodbye feels so dated with the disappearance of payphones.

      That said, the track Superman still holds up.

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